Pop Culture

The Four Chrises, Ranked

List Rules
Vote up the Chrises who out-Chris the other Chrises.

In Hollywood, the era of the Chris reigns supreme. The metroplex is rotten with Chrises, Christophers, and Tophers, but there are four actors have taken the concept of Chris and turned it into box-office gold. Each of these four A-listers - Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Chris Pine, and Chris Pratt - are known as "The Chrises," but how do they stack up against one another?

The only way to figure out which Chris is the best Chris is through the incredibly scientific comparison chart that we've thoughtfully created. We'll contrast the ups and downs of each of their careers while taking a look at what makes them a little more Chris than all the other Chrises out there.

You've got to take all the information provided and vote on which Chris rises above being a simple Christopher or Chrissy, and takes the mantle of the Apex Chris.

  • Chris Hemsworth
    Photo: Thor: Ragnarok / Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

    What You Probably Know Him From: The MCU, The Cabin in the Woods.

    Best Comedic Role: Thor in Thor: Ragnarok.

    Best Dramatic Role: Nicholas Hathaway in Blackhat.

    Most Embarrassing Movie: The Huntsman: Winter's War.

    Fashion Sense: Crossfit chic minus the chic.

    Nude Scenes: The audience gets their Hem's Worth when the Norse god gets his clothes blown off in Thor: Love and Thunder.

    Biggest Controversies: In 2019, Hemsworth and the rest of the MCU were embroiled in controversy over “Fat Thor,” an iteration of the character who put on the pounds in Avengers: Endgame. Critics of this decision found the character's weight to be fatphobic.

    Gift He'd Likely Give You At Chris-mas: Hemsworth is definitely the kind of guy who would forget it's Christmas and then tape together a handful of DVD screeners he has in the closet. It's like you're in the Academy.

    Hobbies/Charities: During the pandemic, Hemsworth got seriously into beekeeping.

    Weird Fact: When Hemsworth was 14, he worked for a pharmacy that rented breast pumps to the home appliance company Fisher and Paykel. It was Hemsworth's job to clean dried milk from the pumps with a toothbrush.

    What Kind Of Dog They'd Be: Easy, four-foot-tall labradoodle that insists on sleeping in bed with you.

    How Likely Is He To Say ‘Bring It In’ When Giving You A Hug: He's saying it before you're even in the room.

    On A Scale Of Kris To Christopher, How Chris Is This Chris?: Pure and simple, this himbo is just Chris.

  • Chris Evans
    Photo: Knives Out / Lionsgate / MRC
    42 VOTES

    What You Probably Know Him From: The MCU, Knives Out.

    Best Comedic Role: Jake Wyler in Not Another Teen Movie.

    Best Dramatic Role: Curtis Everett in Snowpiercer.

    Most Embarrassing Movie: Pick your poison: Push or Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

    Fashion Sense: If athleisure could be even more leisurely, it would be Evans's style in a nutshell.

    Nude Scenes: Evans is tastefully nude in a couple of movies, but if you're looking for pure, unadulterated Evans, you need to check out Not Another Teen Movie.

    Biggest Controversies: In 2022, Evans found himself at the center of an F-5 controversy tornado after the release of Lightyear. First, Toy Story fans were horrified to learn he was voicing the astronaut and not Tim Allen. Then, a lot of fans objected to a same-sex kiss that takes place in the film. Evans hopped into the fray to call out the homophobic fans “idiots.”

    Gift He'd Likely Give You At Chris-mas:  Sorry, but you're getting a donation made in your name to a variety of charities.

    Hobbies/Charities: In his spare time, Cap likes to tap dance. When it comes to charity, the guy can raise money for children and families who are battling cancer all day.

    Weird Fact: The weirdest thing about this Chris is that he's exceedingly normal. Whatever weird stuff he has going on in his private life, he's making sure it's not Googleable.

    What Kind Of Dog They'd Be: If you could mix a Boston Terrier with a Husky, you'd have Chris Evans.

    How Likely Is He To Say ‘Bring It In’ When Giving You A Hug: Evans is too good of a hugger to need to tell you to bring it in. You're already in.

    On A Scale Of Kris To Christopher, How Chris Is This Chris?: Is anyone else getting major Topher vibes from this guy?

  • Chris Pine
    Photo: Wonder Woman 1984 / Warner Bros. Pictures
    36 VOTES

    What You Probably Know Him From: Star Trek, Wonder Woman.

    Best Comedic Role: Rex Hanson in Horrible Bosses 2.

    Best Dramatic Role: Toby Howard in Hell or Highwater, but he also slaps as Captain Kirk in Star Trek.

    Most Embarrassing Movie: This Means War.

    Fashion Sense: Early in his career, Pine had a hot, preppy dad thing going on but since the pandemic, he's been letting his inner Perfume Genius roam free and we're loving it.

    Nude Scenes: Oh buddy, does he ever have nude scenes. He sort of bares the buns in Wonder Woman, but in 2018, he showed the Pine in the 2018 Netflix original Outlaw King. For those of you racing to your Roku, keep in mind the reveal is in a wide shot, and it's only about three seconds long. Still, thumbs up.

    Biggest Controversies: Pine is pretty outspoken politically, but he's not one to flaunt controversy.

    Gift He'd Likely Give You At Chris-mas: A subscription to the New York Times in print, not the app.

    Hobbies/Charities: This Chris loves ballet. Let's see it onscreen, buddy.

    Weird Fact: He eats wet burritos with his bare hands.

    What Kind Of Dog They'd Be: A Dalmatian, the weirdest dog known to man.

    How Likely Is He To Say ‘Bring It In’ When Giving You A Hug: Pine doesn't hug, he bows.

    On A Scale Of Kris To Christopher, How Chris Is This Chris?: Everything about this Chris screams “Kristof.”

  • Chris Pratt
    Photo: Guardians of the Galaxy / Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures
    40 VOTES

    What You Probably Know Him From: Parks and Rec, Guardians of the Galaxy, the Jurassic World franchise, or Everwood if you were glued to The CW in the early 2000s.

    Best Comedic Role: Andy Dwyer in Parks and Rec.

    Best Dramatic Role: Scott Hatteberg in Moneyball.

    Most Embarrassing Movie: Passengers, hands down.

    Fashion Sense: Soccer dad meets Little League coach with a hint of plain-clothes cop.

    Nude Scenes: Ya boy shows off his buns in Passengers.

    Biggest Controversies: Pratt faced a huge backlash for his reported involvement with Hillsong Church, a controversial congregation that caters to celebrities and believers who really like wearing giant wide-brimmed hats. After speaking about his faith, fellow actor Elliot Page asked Pratt to comment on Hillsong's homophobic stance against parishioners. Pratt never responded to Page's tweet, but in a Men's Health cover story from 2022, the star claimed he was never involved with Hillsong.

    Gift He'd Likely Give You At Chris-mas: Either a sweet gas-powered grill or a bunch of leftover Jurassic World swag.

    Hobbies/Charities: Pratt gives A LOT of money to the effort to fight hunger. In 2021, he donated $20,000 to a food bank in South Carolina and another $10,000 to a food bank in Washington State.

    Weird Fact: At one point, he had a dead bug collection.

    What Kind Of Dog They'd Be: Golden Retriever, no question.

    How Likely Is He To Say ‘Bring It In’ When Giving You A Hug: Extremely likely.

    On A Scale Of Kris To Christopher, How Chris Is This Chris?: Pratt may want us to think he's a Chris, but he's clearly a Christopher.